Sunday, March 19, 2006

Qui-Gon : Ni!

Oh... Huh huh, I have to judge this thing or we can't, like, go on, can we, man?
Well, all right, here we go.
Oh, man, I don't feel right doing this. You all worked really hard and, like, I want to be fair and, like, nice.
But, like, nice doesn't win you the bread in this gig, does it?
On to the judging.
Jon, man, you're cool. But, like, I want you to know that... I don't really like the Banana Phone song. The soundtrack that plays while I'm having a bad trip is the repeating rings and that one bloody goober saying Banana Phone like he's really into the song. So, your Banana Phone Shrub (which is more of a miniaturised tree or bonsai style presentation as opposed to a standard shrubbery), is impressive, but not not terrifying enough.
Typho, wow. You just, wow... With the bear and the hand... That hand was really far out. It looked something out of one of M.C. Escher's works, though no giant pen in hand. The Gungan head looked a bit like a K'lfornja Raasen though.
Oneida, dear. I wanted to give you time to show your work, as like, I totally understand losing time due to poppies, man.
Uh... Thing is, Typho and Oneida... As a Knight of Ni (Ni Wally!), *sigh* um, I have a bit of an issue... With, um, rabbits. I was a spy for the Ni (Ni Fatoomch!) and I happened upon the silly Arthur King and his silly silly men, like, in the den of Fwuffers, the Rabbit Guardian of the Sith and of Evil and Bad Times and Not Good Moments of Your Day.
Those cute bunny topiary pieces... They uh, make me think of Gawain... Like, dear, sweet, nice, over-make-up-ed, naive, Gawain. Beheaded by the fluffy daemon! ...Big pointy teeth... Lunging and... The blood, oh Graham, the horror! All five, uh, three that were killed that day...
But Fluke! You have captured my love of whipping stuff in a single shrubbery garden! Proving we are not men... We are um, pioneers who got scalped... But, uh, wow, really nice scalps. But, uh, did I really have to pay for parking and the admission fee to get in?
So, right, Fluke wins...
Now I need to go change my armour.
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Anonymous Anonymous said...


Well OK , sounds good to me, just wanted to act a little perterbed.

Auditioning for a new musical, trying out my actin skills.

Ok lets get on with the beheadin, er the votin off .

8:59 AM  
Blogger Qui-Gon Jinn said...

Um, Jar-Jar, man,
Uh, like, okay, I did my part.
Now that I am living, er, existing as a Force Ghost, with guilt, can I go home and eat brownies now?
JJ's, like, awaitin', man.
Oh, and can I, like, keep some of the shrubs? My garden could use a giant far-out looking hand, man.

9:21 AM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Take the banana phone tree -- please.

Badum bum!

12:20 PM  
Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said...

Thanks for waiting for me, Qui, I really appreciate it. The next laptop my intern gets will have to be compatable with a universal adapter, unlike her current one.

12:39 PM  
Blogger Qui-Gon Jinn said...

Oh, wow...
Oneida, dear, I was, like, worried about you, and stuff, man. I'm glad that, like, you're okay.
I was hoping that we all could have, like, a jam session or a fondue party or something.
Bummer, 'cause, my tenure is up and I'm heading back to Jedi-Land, man.
Oh, and, like, again, really sorry about the judging and stuff. I hope that no-one, like, bears any grudges against me, man.
*looks at the Banana-Phone Tree, gives a pained smile, and lifts to take with him* Looks like I'll be taking a trip to Second Banana Heaven to give my pal, Jo Jo a little gift.

3:20 PM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said...

Dang I had Jon in this bracket. Now I lose in the finals. what a waste of $5

6:39 PM  
Blogger Jo Jo The Monkeyboy's Ghost said...

A gift? For me?


What is it?

6:50 PM  

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