Thursday, February 02, 2006

Oneida: Mmmm, Lemony Goodness

I had an idea of what to do with the lemons, but I didn’t have any idea of how to get at them. Normally, since I’m surrounded by clones and droids, I’d have them do it, they wouldn’t be restricted to the house. But I didn’t bring either, I like my clones, but I’ve never thought of them as pets.

Next my attention turned to the three pigeons that hung out on the stoop outside the house. While pigeons can be very smart, and trained to carry things, I just didn’t have time to contemplate their air speed velocity while laden and un-laden. And how would they carry it? I think the citrus fruit is to smooth for them to grip it with their feet. I moved on, I felt that debate could go on for quite a bit.

Still thinking of animals, my thoughts next turned to these two former lab mice that lived in our attic. One’s very clever, and the other, well, I assume he’s the heart of the operation. I asked them if they could help, but they were busy on some sort of world domination plan. Needless to say, they were too busy to help. This house has the strangest animals in it.

So, without any thought on how to get my lemons using an efficient, clever, unique way, I pulled out my weapon. S-5 Ascension gun, so all I should have to do is aim and shoot. Hope it works out.

Some time later….

Well, I got 4 lemons. The problem is, or was, that the ascension gun is fairly powerful, so it did connect with and knock off the lemon from the tree, it’s just that it kept going, and sometimes got a little stuck in things. I was almost out of luck on the first shot, but Jon’s dog, Sniffy, sensing my distress, freed the cord from the fence, then proceeded to bark/tell me how to adjust the setting on my gun to make it a little less powerful. She then asked if I'd help dig Jon out from under the pile of metal when I was done. Sure, why not, Sniffy. Smart dog, really smart dog, kinda creepy smart dog. But she seems nice otherwise.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

So Who's smarter The Dog or His master ?

:) Only they would know for sure!!

10:58 AM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said...

Lt. Cmdr.; I was able to discern your hidden message and have ordered you a large box of lemons. The will be delivered to the BB: Naboo house, but to be sly I sent it under Captain Typho’s name. Just wait for the UPS (Universe Package Service) on Friday: the tracking number is X1424B0000-Lemures…

Wait Lemurs. No, No I ordered Lemons. Let me look at that slip.

Opps, a small typo. Maybe you should just let the Captain get that package on his own. Lemurs are a little creepy

(tries to sneak out of the room)

12:16 PM  
Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said...


*takes a breath*


*another breath*

Too funny. AOC, I don't know if you're aware of how the Captain feels about lemurs. You didn't do this on purpose, did you? ;)

12:23 PM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said...

(using my best Capt. Renault voice): What I am shocked, shocked I say… to find out that the Captain was mistakenly sent Lemurs

1:08 PM  
Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said...

So you did do it on purpose? AOC, we need to have a long talk when I get back

1:17 PM  
Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said...

lemurs is only eight words away from lemons in the dictionary and you have seen my typing. I am almost positive it was a mistake. :)

2:07 PM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

I can't believe Sniffy was helping you out. I guess I'll let it slide since you helped me out of my little jam here.

3:04 PM  
Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said...

Well, she was on her way back from her encounter with Runt, and being the dog of an Intergalatic Gladiator, she felt obligated to help. And she couldn't move some of the items on you without opposable thumbs, so she was doing it all for your well being.

And AOC.... *gives him s skeptical look*

3:07 PM  
Blogger Shannon said...

OhmyGod - LEMURS! Run, Typho, RUN!

Ditto Oneida, ROFL!

3:57 PM  
Blogger JawaJuice said...

Lemurs...why does it always have to be lemurs...

4:01 PM  

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