Thursday, January 12, 2006

Well, that will teach me not to read the fine print of a contract. It seems when I signed up to be the host of Survivor, that evil producer guy Burnett slipped in a little provision that I had to also be a contestant on the next reality show he did.

So here I am in a big ol house on Naboo. But I guess it aint that bad. Never been to Naboo before. The cool thing is I get ta hang out with some of my ol friends. The not so cool thing is that we can’t leave the house. I hope someone brought a deck of cards with em.

As I got to the house, some of the other contestants were wandering in. Let’s see who we got now…

Hmmm…Well well, Fluke, Typho and Jon. Right there we got the makings of a good poker game.
A bounty hunter named Jango…I think I might stay clear of him…he looks like he could rip my eyes out without even trying.
Oh, there’s Master Yoda and Obi-Wan. Nice to see some Jedi are around to keep the peace…or not.
Ahhh…Senetor Padmé and Commander Oneida…now things are looking up.
A woman named Noel…she’s not human I don’t think…at least she’s not a Hutt.

Oh dear god!!! We DO have a Hutt in the house!!!

Not only that, but for some unknown reason General Grievous is giving him a ride into the house. What’s up with that? Jabafatboy always has to make some grand entrance. Growing up I remember him on Tatooine. He and his sluggy family lived in the trailer park a few blocks down. They always were running around and shooting old cans and listening to that damn hillbilly music and all. Jabafatboy himself use to beat me up after school for my lunch money. I never had it so he would sit on me. He never could understand that you were supposed to demand the lunch money BEFORE school started.

Great. I think I’ll just go find my room for now. First I’ll shake out my robes so that a thick layer of sand can cover the room. Ahhh… that’s better. Us Jawas need lots of sand to sleep on. Next I’ll light up one of my cigars (I brought a whole box of them…my one item from home I could bring.) and rest here for a while.


Oh great…I got Obi-Wan bunking with me.


(And where did he get the Gonzo-size-grab bag of Cheetos? Please tell me there's something else in the cupboards here!)


Blogger Lt. Cmdr Oneida said...

Great pictures!

Oh, and I call a room with Padme and Noel!

11:41 AM  
Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Wow, I think I need some sun.

12:52 PM  
Blogger JawaJuice said...

Jon, ever try getting a tan in space? Just aint happening.

1:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Roomin with!!!

Was nothin in fine print about havin to listen to any other peckerwoods Snore !!

If I gotta room with somebody it might as well be yoda, least I can call his momma if he gives me too much crap.

1:26 PM  
Blogger Revan said...

Are you gonna vote people out?

6:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

nice pictures
those chetooos look Mmmmm Mmmm good

7:44 AM  

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